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I think I’ve gone back a step in the process of finding a husband. For some reason a photo of GM has appeared as my desktop picture again! All day I’ve had nothing but reminders of him. Firstly one of “our” songs (You’ve Got the Love by Candi Staton) was played three times on the radio – bloody TFM - they always play the same song over and over again. Secondly, my colleague kept asking me questions about him as her daughter is the same age as I was when we first started going out and she has just started seeing someone a little older. Talking about my past experiences with him just brought him back into my mind. Thirdly I was flicking through the music channels and With Or Without You by U2 was just starting. This was one of “our” main songs as GM said it was us two down to a tee. Pity he is finding it easy to live without me now!
Anyway, he’s back as my desktop picture. My Mum just tutted when she saw it. She doesn’t quite understand. I don’t think most people really understand. I should have gotten over him by now. I know that. I mean it has been 9 years and I’m fully aware that it’s now an obsession with me, but it’s comforting in a way. A hobby if you like! Missing GM is my hobby.
I have emailed 3 more men on the dating site. No word from the Redcar man. I don’t understand what I’m doing wrong. I am out with my other single friend, her brother and his friends for an all day session on Saturday so you never know. I may have more luck getting out there in the real world. | 